Miss PMS talks

Picture taken from HERE.

Ok. This is soooo going to be an emo post. So, if you think you don't have what it takes to bear with me, just glaze over to another post k. Today, just so you know, I am not me.

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How time really flies. It's already past half the year.

Saturday night, I was joking around with Joe, learning some Korean, whilst the rest played Go Stop. I know.. again! Sunday morning, Joe left for Korea with a heavy heart.

Monday til Thursday and even today has been a haze to me. All I know is that, I feel like an elephant and an ogre at the same time. Fugly me. Hey, everyone has that feeling every once in awhile. And I can't help it if I had swollen eyes for two days due to some allergy that I can pinpoint to.

Besides, I seem to be lethargic 24/7. All I think about is heading back to bed. Just check my plurk status if you don't believe me. Which is what I have been doing yesterday and today- sleeping for at least an hour after Mr. C left for work.

I went to visit him during his break earlier and saw this Grandpa bouncing his cherubic grandchild on his lap happily and right there and then, I just wished to fast forward life to when I am old and wrinkly. To when I am a grandmother, where I can smother my children and grandchildren with love and bounce my definitely will-be, adorable grandchild on my very own lap!

I wouldn't mind skipping past 40 years of what I would deem as my life, mostly the hardships, the disappointments, the never ending wondering and wanderings of what if's, uncertainties and what not's. Because I am getting really tired of thinking about our future, our financial situation, the indefinite wedding that people keep asking when.

And just because I am getting tired of always wondering. Wondering what am I good at, wondering what should I do or what CAN I do. Wondering, wondering, wondering. It's all just plan tiring and makes me sick to my stomach.

Picture taken from HERE.

I kept thinking about it yesterday, I don't know why... about hands interlaced and fingers entwined, about the intimate embrace and caresses on the face, coupled with the sorry's... thinking that, that has got to count for something, doesn't it?

But you know what, I am done thinking for today. For the week, in fact!

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Ok. All the above wasn't really me babbling and rambling. It was PMS talk. I believe that I will feel better, chirpier and much more my bubbly me in a few days time. Til then...

Update: I think the guy that I thought was a grandpa bouncing his grandchild is NOT a grandfather but actually a DAD with his CHILD. You just never know.